Team

Sep 09, 2023

CEO/Chief Encoder

Restoring dignity and impartiality in reporting. Winner of 322 awards in excellence.

Meet Kyle Kissinger (no relation), the enigmatic reporter who's so deeply embedded in the world's most elite, exclusive, and somewhat nefarious clubs that even his coffee orders are classified. As a former US diplomat and weapons contractor, Kissinger has the uncanny ability to make Skull and Bones meetings feel like Monopoly night with pals.

When he's not hobnobbing at The Bilderberg Group, you can find him casually exchanging international policy jokes with The Council on Foreign Relations. Kissinger once convinced The Club of Rome to start a reality TV show about climate change, but shhh, it's still in the brainstorming phase.

Being a card-carrying member of The UN, Kissinger is the go-to guy when diplomats need a good chuckle to break the ice. And as for The World Economic Forum and the Federal Reserve, he runs them in his spare time.

When Kissinger isn't attending soirées at The World Health Organization, he's the life of the party at their infamous Moloch Monday dinners. Rumor has it he was groomed for his coveted position at The Farce Feed by none other than David Rockefeller at the Bohemian Grove. Let's just say it was a hoot!

So, whether he's cracking jokes with secret society dignitaries or deciphering coded menus at clandestine gatherings, Kyle Kissinger (no relation) takes investigative reporting to a whole new level of dignity and impartiality. After all, who needs whistle-blowers when you've got a reporter who's practically on a first-name basis with the Illuminati?

Hans Kraus

Grand Illusionist

Benevolent world leader turned journalist. Author of 'Sovereignty: WHO Needs It' and 'In Defense of Baphomet.'

Once feared as the world's foremost practitioner of tyranny and totalitarianism, Hans Kraus has undergone a transformation that has left the world scratching its collective head and chuckling with disbelief. Born with a knack for power and a flair for the dramatic, Kraus was a man shrouded in mystery from the very beginning.

As a member of various elite organizations, including the United Nations, World Health Organization, and the enigmatic Bohemian Grove, Kraus was always at the center of conspiracy theories and nefarious affairs. It was rumored he held bizarre rituals deep within the Grove, involving an "Altar of Reset" where participants wore hooded cloaks adorned with strange glyph insignia. These rituals, of course, remained secret, fueling the world's suspicions and imaginations.

But just when the world thought they had Kraus pegged, he threw a curveball that left even the most seasoned investigators dumbfounded. In a shocking twist, Kraus decided to join the ranks of The Farce Feed, a news satire publication dedicated to truth, objectivity, fairness, and impartiality.

Yes, you read that right! The man who once embodied all things dark and despotic had apparently turned over a new leaf. He now roamed the hallowed halls of journalism, swapping his hooded cloak for a crisp suit and his cryptic glyphs for a press badge.

Kraus wasted no time in bringing his unique brand of integrity to the world of journalism. He tackled stories with the same gusto he once reserved for world domination. His articles, once filled with decrees and commands, now spilled over with groundbreaking revelations.

As wild as it all sounds, Kraus' writing somehow managed to captivate readers. His transition from despot to journalist was nothing short of astonishing, leaving some to wonder: Was this a genuine change of heart, or just another layer in the enigma that is Hans Kraus?

Whatever the answer may be, one thing is certain: Hans Kraus has gone from an infamous and feared world leader to a legend in mainstream media. And as long as he continues to churn out unbiased, fact-based reporting, the world is content to sit back, read, and believe the narrative.

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