Independent health experts are cautioning the public about the potential dangers of the upcoming Bird Flu vaccine, stating that it could be "100 times worse" than the Covid mRNA injections. This revelation comes after years of debates and evolving narratives surrounding not only vaccine safety and efficacy, but also the competence of our public health institutions.
Dr. Sam Toucan, a renowned avian virologist with a penchant for sugary breakfast cereal, spoke exclusively to The Farce Feed about the grim prospects of a Bird Flu vaccine. "We've seen what happened with the Covid jabs—a load of bollocks that turned out to be neither safe nor effective," Dr. Toucan commented, adjusting his lab coat adorned with Angry Birds.
The once-golden promise of Covid mRNA vaccines, hailed as the ultimate solution to end the pandemic, has now turned into a cautionary tale of severe adverse reactions, evolving variants, endless boosters, and public skepticism. Government officials, caught off guard by the sudden shift in public opinion regarding vaccines, are scrambling to address the newfound concerns. "We assure the public that we're closely monitoring the situation," stated a notable big pharma stooge, wearing a tie adorned with miniature syringe motifs. "Rest assured, we won't roll out the Bird Flu vaccine until we're at least mildly convinced it won't cause widespread myocarditis and death."
In addition, the FDA are cautioning the public not to take the controversial medication Avianmectin, which has not been approved to treat Bird Flu, dismissing the drug as nothing more than bird dewormer. They even put out a snide tweet declaring, "You're not a bird, y'all. Sheep, perhaps, but bird—no. Just stop. We need our emergency use authorization for the new vax so ignore the quacks, no pun intended."
Meanwhile, social media platforms are abuzz with posts mocking the CDC, FDA, and other health agencies, whose credibility is at an all time low after years of lies and pandemic mismanagement. "Fool me once, shame on Pfizer," quipped one user, while another joked about developing immunity to government propaganda instead of actual viruses. "Bird flu? You'd have to be cuckoo to believe a word from these vultures."
In conclusion, as we navigate the tumultuous waters of yet another viral scare, it is crucial for the public to maintain a healthy dose of skepticism and critical thinking. While headlines may scream impending doom and tyrants offer dire warnings, let us not forget the lessons learned from past pandemoniums—question everything, verify sources, and above all, keep a sense of humor, lest you become a bird-brained dodo. What are your thoughts on this latest health scare? Let us know in the comments below!
Context:
Bird flu pandemic could be ‘100 times worse’ than COVID, scientists warn -NY Post
ONE person supposedly got infected and only symptom was mild eye redness… they are using the BS (bird shit) excuse to cull our food supply
Oh, this is priceless! Thank God I bought a case of Visine!